I had planned on continuing my thought from last night, hence the “1/2” on the bottom of the page, but I truly do not know what more I would add. So I won’t. I said from the beginning that I wanted this to have no specific style or frame in which to work, and so far I have not stuck to that. I also acknowledge that this really isn’t being read by that many people, which is understandable, although I would like this to be more widely consumed in the future.
I still don’t have a clear, concise idea of what I would like this to become, although I rarely do with any of my projects. I want to make absurdist art, I want to make evocative pieces, I want to make disgusting things. There is so much I want to do and so much I want to make, but whether that happens is another desire altogether. I want to make things, but I also want to want to make things, which is where the problem arises.
The only problem I can see with having posts alternate between sincere discussions and nonsense or absurdity is the distinction between the two. If I have multiple posts that don’t really share much of a message and are more humorous or fictitious, it might make the genuine posts less meaningful. Not that any of these posts are meaningful, these are just words and lines of code with little to no use behind them, and I’m just an old man shaking my fist at kids riding their bikes too fast.
I will start to post more frequently in the coming days, and I hope that I can keep a steady flow of content, but I may need to take a day, or two, break to come up with something new. For now, here’s something I wrote some years back:
Warmer
The air is warmer
I don’t care for it
It makes me sweat
But
I feel alive
Death brings cold
Life is warm
I fear death
Which gives me a lust for life
A lust for trying
For pursuing things
Pushing things forward
Wanting to create
For people
For myself
I want
I need to make you proud
To make people feel
That’s what I want
In this life
Or the next
The sun is brighter
My head is spinning less
Grub's Dirt 